Art Penance

Yes, it’s once again Film Festival season and once again, TheMan, my friend Sean and I waded into the foray of indie film flicks.

Every year I like to catch up with my old college friend Sean and see the local Film Festival. It’s usually four or so nights with 8 to 18 films by various filmmakers per showing and usually two or three showings a night. I don’t think they show the same film twice, or if they do it’s after the awards are given out and then they show those films. I’m not too sure on that point; we only ever go to one night. Sometimes, one night is even more than I can handle.

Last year I was pleasantly surprised by the films and walked away feeling like I had experienced something worthwhile. Or something. This year? Not so much. We saw the 7pm showing, which had 10 films in the line up and of those 10 films 3 of them were films I enjoyed watching in their entirety and would most likely happily watch again. One was a documentary about making this art instillation called “Balkan Erotic Epic”. If you’ve never seen a dozen eastern European guys lying buck naked in a meadow somewhere out in the farmlands of Seria and humping the ground for all their worth, then you are clearly missing out. It was the funniest thing I’d seen in quite a while and I have to say the documentary looked much more interesting than the actual art piece. The second one was a hand drawn animation bit which was cleverly written and amusing while the third piece was an animated piece as well, but was more clever in the animation than in the writing. It was basically gun fight chase scene but all the characters were cut out stills from film noir movies, except lots of little cut out stills that they animated with so the cut outs moved like they characters did in the movies.

Three films had really interesting content/technique but were too unfocused and too long for the subject. Unless the subject was “Bore the ever loving shit out of your audience because you’ve gone way past the point of interesting and landed smack into tedious”. Don’t give me the whole “Well, you obviously don’t understand Art” excuse because 9 minutes of kabuki finger puppet with a projected image of the artist dressed up in a sari waving her hands around? Is 8 minutes too long. The whole projection thing was pretty cool and some of the music was funky but after 2 minutes at most I was done with it. Sadly, the movie wasn’t. The other film was much better, save the inclusion of numerous wildly unfocused shots and want of a good editor. The second filmmaker had some absolutely stunning images which would have been a beautiful 7 minute flick (with some good editing) but instead it was over nine minutes long. And quite a lot “artfully” unfocused. The third film did some funky stuff with mirrors but again, didn’t need to see a minute plus of a chick rubbing away steam.

Then there are the rest of the films. 2 of them were films that I wouldn’t watch again but weren’t overly painful to sit through. One had some cool images (but again, editing! One time Baby feeding = cute! Longer second Baby feeding = zzzzzz) and a couple interesting soundtrack overlays (someone was reciting pi to 1000 places and there were a couple numbers stations mixed in as well) but the eardrum piercing parts could have really been left out. The second one was a Black Dahlia thing that looked like a student film project. Nothing really special came of that one save that it was short.

Lastly, the two films that made me want to find the film maker and pith their creative center so that no one would ever again have to be subjected to watching their work. One was inappropriately placed after the film with bizarre ass “focus issues masquerading as art” since this film too was all jiggy with the out of focus fuzzy. It also had some sort of overlay of scritchey scratchy yellow and red shit on top of the unfocused whatever and HATE. There was no reason for this film to exist but it did and it sucked 5 minutes of my life away that I’m never getting back. The second film was kinda cool in concept but sucked giant cheesy stupid filmy ass in reality. I guess the filmmaker wanted to show the present day mission where Hitchcock filmed Vertigo so he matched up the shots and faded from film to present day to film to present day. MwAHHhhhhh Jimmy Stewart MwAHHhhhhh today MwAHHhhhhh Jimmy Stewart MwAHHhhhhh today and just about as fast. Talk about puke inducing AND! The damn filmmaker didn’t even line up the shots correctly despite having Vertigo with him on the set. ARRRGH! HATE! And also YARK!


Last year at the booniverse: No crazy film nothing for you!

Last last year at the booniverse: Or funky animated dudes.

The year before at the booniverse: The tire looked like it had melted off it was that flat.

The year before that at the booniverse: And nothing today either.

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