Christmas Friday Five Edition

Double your pleasure, double your fun! Here’s ten totally bogarted Christmas themed questions for a Christmas meme.

1. Do you have a favorite Christmas tradition?

My mumses has an Advent calendar that was a big thing with my sister and me. It had 24 pockets across the bottom (numbered 1-24) and an


Christmas tree on top and each pocket had a little ornament on it that you could take off the pocket and put on the tree. Then we got to see what was in the pocket and distribute it to the other sib. We took turns hanging the ornament and mouse Santa was ALWAYS the top ornament.

2. When do you open gifts – Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?

Are you kidding me? Nobody’s ever gotten to open gifts on Christmas Eve. Ever. Believe me, my sister and I tried for years but it simply isn’t done. And if you are opening gifts on Christmas eve you’d better put them back in the box and rewrap them before my mumses finds out or you’re going to get into so much trouble. Come that day, I do not know you and we never met. [makes the sign against the evil eye and inches away slowly]

3. What is your favorite Christmas cookie?

Pfeffernuss, all the way. We never made them and they are really hard to find (unlike the nutty cookies that look an awful lot like Pfeffernuss cookies. Bad nut ball cookies!) so I don’t get them too often.

4. Real tree or fake?

Always fake. I grew up with the smell of melting plastic as one of the Christmas odors (and also that meant someone had to go find the bulb that was touching the tree and melting it before the whole house CAUGHT ON FIRE! Good times) so in my heart, it’s not Christmas unless the tree is put together. Later on, my parents got into the whole real tree thing (starting with trees complete with root balls so we could plant them come spring and then later cut ones) and let me tell you; as the official light putter on-er, real trees suXXX0r. I’d get all sorts of red itchy spots from the damn needles trying to weave lights up and down the branches. The wonderful “smell of the tree” was never worth it to me for the hours of itchy bumps putting lights on gave me.

5. Do you want something for Christmas that you know you will not get?

I don’t know what I want let alone what I won’t be getting. I suppose I can be all maudlin and say a baby Q.

6. What’s the worst gift you ever got at Christmas time?

Some would say the Wall Marley but I loved that thing. It was so ugly it stole my heart (and I got it because I got home really late from college that year and everyone else had gotten to choose what stupid gift from the grab bag of stupid that they wanted and all that was left was the Wall Marley). OH! I remember one that was less than stellar. I once got a neon dayglow yellow sweatshirt that had ME written across it in neon dayglow one foot high bright green letters. Ummmmm, OoooKAY then. Yes, yes it is me inside this sweatshirt here. Good thing that was printed across the front or there’s no telling who might be in here.

7. Do you write thank you cards for Christmas gifts?

I really should, I really don’t. Bad me.

8. Do you get a Christmas bonus at work?

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha! *breathe* Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

9. How old were you when you found out the truth regarding Santa Claus?

What, that he has street clothes the other 364 days of the year? He does? Heh. In the boo house you always believe in Santa because otherwise he wont come. As an adult, I guess it’s more the spirit of Santa that I believe in rather than the fact that an actual guy comes down a chimney with stuff. As an interesting side note; during those formative years when my sis and I were discovering that Santa may indeed not be a fat guy that gives gifts, my parents told us that they were Santa’s emissaries. They said that the reason Santa can get to every house in one night is that he works with some of the parents and the parents get the toys on Santa’s say so and distribute them around the tree. Boo’s family Santa delegated! Or subcontracted, depending on how you look at it.

10. Do you buy your boss a Christmas gift?

Heh. Nope. I bake a bunch of Holiday stuff for the office and call that good.

Last year at the booniverse: It also probably makes the room smell like cat ass but it keeps them happy and Isaak quiet. That alone is worth the waft of cat ass.

Last last year at the booniverse: Whoooo! Three cheers and a whoot for me today because I wrapped nearly ALL the presents last night. I rock!

The year before at the booniverse: Hmmm, I think what sounded like bastard cookies was when you said “bastard cookies”.

The year before that at the booniverse: Hee! Say it in an Andy Griffith voice and it becomes even funnier!

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