Ice Cream, Kitties, Body Checking and Where’s My Toner?

I’m trying to decide what to write about today. Yesterday was kind of fun in a spazoid collection of almost thoughts way but I’m not sure I should subject my readers to that sort of “flow of boo thought” more than once in a while. I have no problem with it, but then again that’s my normal mode of thinking. No really, I can’t multitask at all, but I can jump from idea to idea so fast it looks like I’m multitasking. I’m exceptionally good at that (although it has lead me to ask TheMan questions with no frame of reference what so ever, like “I think ice cream would be better, don’t you?”).

So even though I have a bunch of little thoughtlets today, again, I have been thinking of what I should present as a unified entry. The stand by “What I did last night” came to mind but that would look like-

Hi! We got home. We played EQ. I did something to my shoulder and now it hurts. Lots.

Zzzzz. All four of my readers would be considering deleting me from their bookmarks. About the only fun thing we did was decide that the kitties were old enough to accept the responsibility of going UPSTAIRS. They will be 9 years old this year, it’s about time we started treating them like grown up cats. Translated into realityease, the kitties are not allowed upstairs, upstairs gets digit slowing cold if you don’t leave the door to the downstairs open and both of us were too lazy to corral and restrain the cats. I personally like the thoughtful edge the first way gives us, like we debated for hours if the kitties could handle this responsibility and came to an adult decision. Being Cheeto butts really isn’t as glamorous but far, far closer to the truth.

Just in case you were wondering, Isaak is clearly not old enough to handle the new responsibility because he spent half the time yowling in my ear ball and the other half glued to my lap shedding about three cats worth of fur onto my sweater. He lasted 20 minutes before he totally lost his shit and flew downstairs to the safety of the bed. The Little Kitty, on the other hand, had a blast. She was really funny too, she would scoot around sniffing this, poking at that, going here and there and then she would stop and look back at us as if to say “Really? It’s OK? Even here?” and then she would be off again doing this and that until she stopped and turned around again “Even here? And here? What about over here? It’s all OK?”

She discovered TUB again and spent many a happy moment communing with the big porcelain (are tubs made out of porcelain?) god of shower water and coolness for the pads of her feet. There is something wrong with that cat; I forgot about her tub joy and the fact that she must haul ass from wherever she is to the bathroom before you can close the door and keep her out. She has missed her bathroom time I think. I’m not sure how we have damaged their poor smooth kitty brains by yelling the begeebus out of them for going upstairs all this time and then suddenly letting them hang with no repercussions in the UPSTAIRS. Ah well.

I also thought about writing about the absolute rampant moronishness that has spawned today but I’m not sure that would be much of a post either.

Bitch cut in line today so we gave her lip. Then the dude who plowed back into the door while we were going out got some lip too and TheMan suggested that I should have body checked him.

And there ya go! A couple things of note here though, TheMan suggested bodychecking. That’s one damn rude fella if my normally sane and forgiving (and “having a much more socially acceptable outlook on the proper working of being in public”) husband looks at his normally feral wife and tells her “You should have body checked him.” I thought about it too, but I didn’t feel like there was *quite* enough cause to body check him because I was (cough) sort of taking up the whole door at that time anyway. He left just before we did, hawed a moment a couple steps from the door and then turned around and plowed right the hell back in so I kind of didn’t give him enough room to do his plowing without him looking like a total ass when he knocked into me. Since I was sort of more in the way that I might have been I figured a body check would have been totally over the top. I did yell at him good though. RARH!

The entitled middle aged saggy lady this morning though, she needed a good solid body check to the head. TheMan and I were waiting in line for the next available cashier to help us (like millions of other places that have one line and several counter staff) and this lady walks in, sees us waiting and jollys over to the cashier who does not immediately have a customer but who has not yet finished doing drawer stuff. Oh no! Mrs. “I dislike waiting” gloms herself up to the counter and has her overly made up wrinkle ugly face right there up front so the cashier can hardly see much of anything but the scary cragged face of a beach bunny has been. When the cashier does look up, with confusion because she had seen us earlier and we are most definitely not who is leering at her now, the lady starts in on her order blippity blam:

LeatherFace: “Yes, I’d like-”
Boo AND TheMan: “Ahh, excuse us, I believe WE were the next people in line?”

You can tell she is so totally busted. It’s not like she accidentally wandered in and didn’t see two 6 foot people hovering where the line always is because if she HAD she might have said “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t see you.” Or “Oh excuse me, I didn’t notice you.” Or even “Oh. Oops.” No, instead she sidles over to the other cashier, rolls her eyes so dramatically I though they might just plop back into her skull and stay there and says to her cashier “Well, there is really no need for being so snitty this early” People who decide that they are going to cut and then get busted for cutting always have some sort of “Well, how rude” type response. Oh, the eye roll too but sometimes you don’t catch that. You always catch at least some of what they say to other people because they want you to know that you are the rudest person ever and they are so on to you (andnevermindthattheyjustgotBUSTEDand didn’tgetawaywithTHEIRrude) and really! Fffffft!

That just pisses me off. You KNOW she was banking on us not saying anything because most people don’t (although I’ll have to say most people aren’t feral six hours out of ten so I guess today was her unlucky day. Heh, no biscuit for her!). If nobody does, great, power to her or whatever but if someone calls you on the rude, just quit. Some grand injustice has not been perpetrated on your person because someone has the nerve to say “Ummm, hey!” so just drop the act. I don’t think we would have been as mad if she had given us a look of confusion or an “Oops”, even if it wasn’t sincere but the tude. ARRRGH! The tude! That was the icing right there.

OK, maybe cutter wench and door busting guy aren’t “idiocy” per se but ARRRGH! I’m holing up in a cave and waiting until the stupids are off the streets. Stupid bloated idiots!

I may also have a very low tolerance for laziness and stupidity or people who just don’t think, which is rather hypocritical no? I had to send a nasty gram to one of the suppliers because we had an incident with the damn toner (again) and obviously saying “Hey, please don’t order any more of these toners that do not go into any of the printers we own” is somehow too complex a request. Sometime late yesterday the order came in with (surprise!) three toners of antiquity! Sometime later one of the printers downstairs ran out of toner so, according to procedure, the student on shift last night dutifully grabbed a replacement toner and went to fix the problem. Unfortunately, they grabbed a toner (of antiquity) and it didn’t fit, so they got another one and that one didn’t fit either (mostly because it was the exact same kind of toner as the first one that didn’t fit, but technicalities). They decided to solve the problem by yanking the toner from the other machine and putting it into the machine that had run out of toner.

So…the conclusion of all this action was that there was one printer out of toner. Yeah. I’m still not sure what was going on there (and I haven’t found the missing toner cartridge either which raises an eyebrow) but I tell you, finding a printer sitting there with NO toner cartridge what so ever was most bizarre. I’m also not sure why the student opened a toner of antiquity, and then opened the exact same kind of toner again or why they didn’t look where the correct toner has always been (and was last night) but I can’t say it is totally their fault for the toner thing. Now, the toner hopping that went on, that’s just weird.

Ahh well, I’m going home and I’m going to scritch the kitties because I expect them to be stupid and that’s OK. They have smooth little walnut brains, they can’t help it.

Last Year at the booniverse: Disappearing in the middle of a conversation without any warning makes me feel like I could be talking to the walls

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