Allllright, it’s been enough time for the April Fool’s thing and I ought to post more than once a week so here are your answers.

1. I used my vacation time wisely and now have my seeds planted in little peat pots in preparation for May planting.

FALSE! Bwa! I *still* haven’t done ANY gardening. Any. The only thing I’ve done so far this year is take a wander around the gardens to see what survived and what hadn’t. It did involve moving the leaf mulch piles around the roses just a wee bit, but then repackaging them up again because I don’t trust Michigan. Maybe in May I’ll dewinterize my gardens but now? Chyah…I don’t think so Mr. (Mrs.) Hovering around freezing weather. BTW, I seem to have only lost 2 roses of the 6 new ones I planted and the 12 I have all together. I’m counting that as a mighty fine survivability rate. I may not have lost either of the two suspiciously dead looking ones anyway as I was looking for some bud action and not pulling rose stump vitals. Who knows, they might Lazarus up from their crispy dead stalk ashes. If not, DARWIN!

The dead roses do not include the purple roses of awesomeness nor the crazy rosebushes (which weren’t part of the new 6 anyway, but I knew you were on edge about the crazies). I think one was red and the other was…white? Yellow? I forget. Either way, I have exact copies in the other garden so I might do some cutlet planting if I need to.

2. I am considering cutting out a blueberry patch in the back yard.

FALSE! I am considering putting in elderberry bushes or maybe blackberry/raspberry bushes at some point in time though.

3. I had a Philodendron that was 20+ years old.

TRUE! I was mucking about the archives and it turns out that this Philodendron in question was actually more like 40 years old. I nipped it in the bud though and managed to kill it off several years ago so no Guinness book of world plant holding records for me. Unless you count the fact that I actually kept the thing alive for maybe 10 years (and there might still be bits of it around somewhere because Philodendrons are krazy easy to propagate).

4. I have at least 15 houseplants here and there at home.

FALSE! First of all, I’ve managed to melt not one, not two but three different jade plants and the latest survivor of many, many years just bit it (with a lot of help from Little Kitty. Bastard). I think the only plants left in the house is the giant peace lilly from Grandma Minnie’s funeral last year and an “air plant” which TheMan and I have a disagreement over. I don’t think air plants are really plants at all; I just think they are dead, dyed things that give planticidal people like me hope. TheMan is convinced they are actually plants.

5. Five of those I brought into work where they decorate my desk.

FALSE! I only *have* (had) two possibly 3 live plants at home and I work underground so there you go. No plants for me. I even tried growing plants a while back and all I got was mold. Which is technically a plant, but I was going for tea and marigolds.

6. I own seven stock pots.

Ummmm….true. Not all of them are mine though, I came into this marriage with less than 7 stock pots!! Two less actually, but IT COUNTS! In our defense, one is ginormously HUGE and sort of dedicated to doing wine things with. The next size down is the stock making pot, then I have 2 that are good soup making pots, of course there is Mssr. Bucket, and some weird sort of low sided stock pot things which are part of a set. They make good sgetti noodle pots.

7. I do not own a flan pan.

TRUE! How am I supposed to make a proper flan without a flan pan? Besides, flan pans look cool and every time I’m at some place with all the tasty baking stuff I like to go over and play with the flan pans. I also like playing with the spring form pans and the bread pans and the muffin tins and the Bundt pans and…

8. I love baking bread in the bread bot.

FALSE! Oh, I think I *would* love making bread in the bread bot if I did ever get to make bread in the bread bot but TheMan and the bread bot have a special relationship that I don’t want to get between. Besides, the only thing better than home made bread bot bread is home made bread bot bread that someone else made. Put a crust of fresh bread bot bread in my mouth.

9. I have made baklava.

TRUE! It’s surprisingly easy to make if a bit tedious. It has something like 150 layers of filo dough and each layer has to be brushed with butter but it’s not that bad. I get kinda zen about it with the brush, layer, brush, layer. The hard part I find is buttering the first layer after the nut mixture layer (it wiggles all over the place) and cutting the whole thing after you are done. I hate cutting baklava but I do like pouring the syrup over the hot bits when it comes out of the oven. Sizzle!

10. While I prefer to drink diet Coke, a rum and Coke really needs to be made from the straight up Coke.

Oh absolutely! I’ve tried rum and diet coke and personally, I’d rather do without the booze. BLECH!

2008: Badmovie thinks I should make a button that says “The Pelé of Cheese” and leave it at that.

2007: TRUE! No FALSE! No wait…

2006: DQ, on the other hand was br-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-ting around her stack of puppets so by the time I had zschicka-ed one side of a puppet she had finished three, but that’s not the point!

2005: After nearly becoming one with the sock puppet, Badmovie suggested we go haunt the favorite Smithee place of foodage: Casa des Pizzas.

2004: JSFR: Softick

2003: Then Cursed Beanie Skeletor Death up and strangled the person to death.

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