Getting the Collar

Is this not the most beautiful collar ever? Yes it is! Just look at it’s innate collarness, there could be none finer.

Day…four I think of the “Teach boo to sew” project and DQ’s machine has not gone up in a brilliant cloud of smoke. Yet. DQ is also alive, having not gone mad and committed suicide for having to sit through my granny style machine driving or been hauled off by the police for strangeling me while I attempted to sew in a marginally straight line. Sort of. Well, straight in a very Lombardianesque perspective.

The project du jour was COLLAR and potentially button panels but who are we kidding? My two hours were spent fighting with the concept of “collar” and “straight line” which I still have not mastered. I’m also pretty shaky on “pressing without burning some body part” and “attaching cloth bits together in a reasonable manner”. What I have mastered is the art of taking the stitching out.

I’d like everyone to meet my new best friend.

Seam Ripper and I got along quite amiably through my inability to drive a straight line, which resulted in a half inch difference between collar sides, and my inability to correct my not driving a straight line, which did fix the lopsidedness of the original stitch but created a whole slew of new problems. Plus, I didn’t quite catch the white strip of the selvage edge the second time through and the third time through the machine knotted up. Isn’t the fourth time the charm?

After several runs at making the collar pieces into a serviceable collar, I finally ended up with something that ain’t too shabby and only a couple millimeters off from one side to the other (the wonders of folding, mirror matching and a marking pencil. Evidentially I can follow a drawn line fairly well). Oh, and the collar has a righteously ironed on interfacing to boot. I can stick that stuff on like it was a walk in the park. I think my ability to steam burn body parts has something to do with that since the directions say to hold the iron in place for 10 to 15 seconds. You generate a lot of steam in 10 to 15 seconds, there are more than ample opportunities to burn at least some small bit of skin.

I ended the night with a badly basted on collar that will have to be seam ripped off (why hello my old friend!) and repinned and rebasted. Somehow, you are supposed to be able to drive the machine in a straight line AND be able to see what you are sewing on the underside of the piece as well. Maybe you grow an extra pair of sewing eyes after a while because I thought my collar was the BOMB when I first basted it on. My line was straightish to the point where it didn’t wander into iffy territory and it looked good from the back side. But. The minute it was flipped over I discovered a line of electric lime green stay stitching popping in and out of the collar seam. Damn! It’s going to have to be redone until the damn stay stitching is on the inside of the seam, which runs along the bottom side of the machine. I suppose I have until Tuesday to start growing those eyes that see on the underside of the cloth as that will be installment five of the “learn to sew” project.

So I’ll continue on with my Zhu-dup… Zhu-dup… Zhu-dup… Zhu-dup… Zhu-dup… Zhu-dup… pace of sewing and hopefully have a finished, decent project before Halloween. And maybe someday I’ll be as competent as DQ and be able to sew at fd-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d speed and maybe get a project done in a week. Whooo!

Your moment of Zen: My jaunty sideways electric lime green bat pocket. Worship my 1337 pocket making 5ki11z!

Last year at the booniverse: JSFR: Edamame Pretz.

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