Our third show of the season was a pretty awesome success and look! Surprise Penguin!

Getting to Penguicon was an interesting experience full of snafu and frustration. It took from August to January to get a human response as to whether we were even invited and then there was a huge fuddle duddle about the price. LunarGeography, Badmivie and I went down around 3pm and both Badmovie and LG were charged $35 while I was charged $45 and TheMan, who arrived two hours later, was charged $50. There wasn’t even a price of $50! It was a supreme miscommunication between the event coordinator and the event worker-bees. Eventually, though, we all got the correct entrance fee and we set about gathering people for the show.

The geese couldn’t get in at all so they hung out on top of the buildings. Poor geeses.

SmitheeTime! We didn’t get as keen a room as last year but we got a ballroom on the cool side of the ballroom block. Word has it that the other side was roasty toasty hot.

LunarGeography and I did our “walky-talky” but somewhere around Alas we had standing room only. Woah! I heard later on that some people made special plans in their Penguicon schedule to attend the Smithees. GROUPIES!

Speaking of groupies! Heh. This is a former coworker of BadMovie’s that I made pose like that. As for people, we had a really good turnout this year: 69 total brains touched by Smithees over 4 hours of show; 44 max high voters. Although, according to the official Penguicon body counter we had 48 people in the room. Took me a while to figure out that he was counting the four of us. Fair enough. The counter fella also said we had the most by far of all the room he was counting so woot!

I did notice he made us the last stop on his hourly room count each time he came around. He also hovered at the door until he had to go and do con business on several of those occasions. Heh.

We had also arranged a special surprise for one of the Guests of Honor. Howard Taylor of Schlock Mercenary was on a panel next door to ours and way long ago he wrote a scathing review of the Uwe Boll dreckfest BloodRayne. He HAAAAAATED it with a passionate hate and went so far as to say that if he found out that anyone saw the film after he warned them against it, he would call up that person’s friends and tell them to put ants in their bed. The person would wake up screaming, covered in ants and think “Well, at least I’m not watching BloodRayne” Being Smithee people, we could not let this stand so Badmovie found a copy on E-Bay and we watched it. It’s…bad but we’ve seen worse.

But! We were not done. Oh no. TheMan doctored up the cover, Photoshopped in some pull quotes from the review (Wake up…screaming!) and dropped Howard Taylor’s review in the movie blurb on the back. Then we contacted Orvan the Acme Delivery Ox and arranged for the package to be delivered.

Apparently TheMan did such a good job with the Photoshopping that Howard Taylor thought he had just gotten another copy of BloodRayne. He started to go off on a rant about the horribleness of the movie when he looked at the review on the back and exclaimed “Oh wait, *I* wrote this!” He read it to the audience, opened up the case and found the sticker of ants we had put inside. All in all he was pretty tickled I think.

We finished up at around midnight, counted the last ballots and announced the winner.

Of course it was time for BOOZ. We met Howard Taylor wandering through the bar and chatted with him a bit. The funniest remark was his comment “Do you guys watch any good movies?” Heh. He recommends “How to Train Your Dragon”.

The bar was adjacent to the Chaos Machine which was slowly erected over the course of the evening.


2009: No surprise penguin or update for you.

2008: Still no word on posting.

2007: Saturday I was supposed to go to a big retirement party thing, but I woke up evil and things went south from there.

2006: Shhhh! Sleeping off my Penguicon experience.

2005: That and my sis decided to take all the doors off and paint them WHILE WE WERE MOVING all my stuff from the Stadium house to the condo. What?

2004: Giant Pixie Sticks yes, entry no.

2003: My experiment mutated.

2 Responses to “PenguiSmithees”

  1. Sean K. Says:

    What? Penguicon charges you guys for admission? As I recall, you get into Origins for free – does Penguicon not realize the value of the programming you provide? Perhaps they need a lesson…

  2. boo Says:

    We don’t exactly get into Origins for free, they give price breaks for presenters and because of the length and the audience of the Smithees (and other MATHS things which I can’t figure out) we get in free. Penguicon did give us the highest presenter discount, which was nice.

    I am hoping our numbers make them sit up and go “Hmmm!”

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