Choose Your Own Japanese Vampire Adventure Movies and Other Stories

I started out today really rather miffed because I got stuck doing someone else’s job when they “refused” to do it. No problem! Bring it! Boo loves to do the onerous work! Whoooo! For three and a half hours I got to do another department’s menial work and I grumbled a mighty grumble! Then THEN I about popped a gasket when the original “too good to do my work” party didn’t offer to bust butt down 12 stories to pick up the damned project. No Problem! Boo not only loves to do YOUR JOB but boo loves to hand deliver YOUR JOB to your lazy ass PROMPTLY!


What really happened is that the original party had let her boss know that the copier wouldn’t do the job in a quick and timely fashion and she didn’t have the time to piecemeal the job. Then, somehow (the exact mechanics of which I am still rather uncertainly vague about) word got out that we had a copier that would do the job. Except we don’t. I don’t think (it was a matter of project integrity. I am under the impression our copier *could* have batch processed the job in the base sense of the idea of batch processing but I was not at all confident in the machine’s ability to not mangle the original material). So I did it all by hand, one part at a time. The original party was mortified and almost kissed my feet in obsequious apologizing because her intension wasn’t at all to have me do the pieces part processing of her job. She was all for sending the job to a copy center but then there was that rumor of our stupendous copier and the rest is history.

Man, that totally bites. For both of us. Circumstances just stuck me with the short ugly “did the dirty work” end of the stick, which miffs me (especially when it would and should have gone out to a copy shop. Where they…you know…copy (But! We have that miracle copy machine, don’tcha know!)) but I can live with that. The original party, on the other hand, now has a nasty little rumor going around about how she refused to do a job and we had to pick up her slack. That’s the suck of rumor mills, right there. I’m cool with the original party and I’m cool with her boss but I’m not cool with the bad communication.

Badmovie and LunarGeography came over last night and, of course, Badmovie brought his six pack of bad movies. He realized last night that he always brings six movies to any movie night gathering. Not necessarily the same six but six none the less. Maybe six is the magic Smithee number? Who knows. We chose from his bag of evil (versus our borrowed Son of Bag of Evil) and watched Dracula Lake. Or Lake Dracula? I don’t rightly remember exactly, but it was an amusing ditty for a Japanese Dracula flick.

The cover is the best part of the whole deal, it reads like a choose your own adventure story. No really! There is a line that goes something like “Someone mails you a coffin, what do you do?” Doesn’t that beg for a follow up of “If you return it to sender, go to page 45. If you open it up, go to page 50”? I think so. There were a few Smithee category nominees and one scene which really doesn’t fit into anything but amused me to no end. Our Hero is talking to Our Heroine in a pretty standard two shot, but with some open book case deelie in the foreground that breaks up the frame a bit. No big there. Then, the camera man does one of the weirdest and uuugliest dolly zoom creepy crawly shot transition things I’ve ever witnessed. He sort of ooches along so that Our Heroine slowly slides off the screen on the left while Our Hero looms closer and closer and bigger and blurrier on the right. The camera simultaneously slips sideways while sneaking around the back of Our Hero (whose head is Large! and Blurry! and Filling! Most! Of! The! Screne!), which allows Our Heroine to slide back into the shot. The dolly/zoom/creep/WTF? ends with and over Our Hero’s shoulder two shot. I don’t even remember what they were saying during the whole sequence and we watched it twice.

Since it was a work night, we only watched one movie. We did manage to eat most of two large pizzas and drink a good third of a margarita bucket though. Huzzah!

And lastly, TheMan and I did not spontaneously combust after having woken up at 5 o’clock IN THE MORNING in order to get to TheMan’s work place at 6 o’clock IN THE MORNING for a film shoot. Him, not me. Plus, we then had to work the usual schedule and still, no fireballs of utter toastiness. Not even a bizarre choose your own Japanese Vampire adventure movie did us in. Huzzah! I even conquisted the Horde for the second day in a row (thankyouverymuch), I feel supremely accomplished. Whoooo!

Last year at the booniverse: On one hand it feels like we failed the parent test, on the other hand babies usually don’t eat their beds when you leave them alone for a couple of hours.

Last last year at the booniverse: Doing absolutely NUTTIN last year.

The year before at the booniverse: Today’s wonderful topic for your intellectual edification is…ummm…well I don’t have one yet.

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