Calling Out The Company

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Meet our newest houseguest. Meow, this is the booniverse readership. Booniverse readership, this is Meow. Meow’s visited before and each time there is a HUGE angst storm courtesy of the weirdoes.

For instance! Saturday when my Sis and her husband (who I really have to find a cool moniker for) came over for dinner and Meow instillation, we had the basement all blocked off so the Meow could get a little bit of peace and quiet time before the kitties were integrated (and the excrement oscillated most majestically). However, upon further reflection (and thinking about my sanity for the next three weeks) I decided to just keep them segregated. I know, I know, I am such a cat bigot. Anyway, late Saturday night I had to fish the weirdoes cat box out from the basement to put it in the small bedroom. This I did, but not before Meow had paid it a visit. No worries, this is what a litter box is for right?

This is entirely wrong attitude to have if you are a cat. Meow had transgressed on the holy box of sand, which was cause for great sniffing and rending of sack cloth and flinging of ashes (I’m sure there is a more biblical term for the ash thing, but I can’t think of what it might be). Oblivious to cat religion politics, I scooped up Vande-cat and plopped her in front of the new location of the litter box. This is what one does when they move the box and want the cats to do their business in the new location and not the old location or another location left up to the cat’s choice. Usually the cats give the box a look and go scurrying off to do their cat things. Not this time. Vande got a good sniff in, and then another and another…sniff…sniff…sniff. *pause* SNIFF! SNIFF!

I tracked down Isaak, hauled him out of his comfy place and trekked him to the box for the ritual depositing of the cat at the holy shrine of litter and found Vande-cat…still sniffing. Huh. Then Isaak started in on the sniffing, which must have taken all the sniffs from Vande because she hissed a mighty hiss at him. He in turn smackered her upside the head and it was ON! I left the room. One should not witness such overt displays of personal cat box religion.

They calmed down eventually because really, Isaak is a pretty mellow cat when it comes to this sort of stuff (vet visits aside). He was content to loaf around and pretty much ignore the fact that there was an interloper cat in the basement. Vande…well Vande never did play well with others (and she runs with scissors too). Periodically she’d have to up and visit the gate to growl at the basement. Sometimes when Meow was on the stairs, sometimes not but with Vande, it’s all about getting her cheap shots in. She’s really rather a bitchy little cat.

The best part though, was last night when I went down to do laundry. I wound up sitting on the stairs and having some quality cat time with the Meow, who was getting quite lonely after a day of no dogs, people or birds. She was very happy to see me, even falling right over when she overbalanced a kitty elevator butt thing. Heh! We had a cat moment or two, and then I got my stuff together to go back upstairs. Lo! Who should be watching the both of us with the most hurt and betrayed expression in catdom but Isaak. “But…cat-mom! How could you!” Double heh!

The weirdoes needed some quality cat time of their own (so they didn’t stage a coup…there’s nothing quite so pleasant as a 3am cat reminder of how unhappy they are) so I flopped down to give them some cat TLC. Isaak was all for some scritchieage, but Vande…Vande smelled a rat. Or rather, a Meow. Sniff?!?? Oooo, she was not a happy cat and was having none of the cat time because I smelled like The Enemy! Oh the sniffing! I thought she was going to snort my arm up to the elbow. SNIFFFF! Sniffsniffsniffsniff SNIFFFFF!

After inhaling all the scent off my person, she huffed off with purpose. Well OK then! I sauntered upstairs until all holy cat hell broke out. TheMan went to see what was going on and found the Little Kitty screaming at the gate, giving Meow what for. “Biotch! If I ever smell your ho stank on my cat mom again, I am going to rip you!” Even Meow was all “WTF? Ahhhh…anyone notice the CRAZY CAT up there? Hello? Well screw this, she’s about three kibbles shy of dinner!” Of course, this was some sort of victory for the Little Kitty, who proudly marched herself back into the bedroom, flopped down in the cat bed and bleated until I gave her some scritchies.

Three more weeks. Hey! My mumses will be back by then. Want a cat or two mumses?

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Well, if she’s gonna go be all growly at the Meow, I’m going to eat her krunchies!


Last year at the booniverse: JSFR: Ramune (kiwi)

Last last year at the booniverse: Sniff? SniffSniffSniff.

The year before at the booniverse: Now I am going to have to find it again and buy it (again) so I will have it back in my collection. I am very vexed.

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