*ring ring*<\/p>\n
“Hello?”<\/p>\n
“Yes is this [PUBLISHING COMPANY EXECUTIVE]?”<\/p>\n
“Uh, yes. How did you get this number?”
\n
\n“That’s not important right now. I’m calling about a book I sent you a few weeks ago. I just got the rejection letter and I was wondering if you could answer a few questions.”<\/p>\n
“I’m sorry, we send out a lot of rejection letters…”<\/p>\n
“I’m sure you remember it. It’s the story of Moojí.”<\/p>\n
“Oh. Yes. ‘Moojí, The Boy Raised By Onions.'”<\/p>\n
“That’s the one! Anyway, the rejection letter is kind of vague. I was wondering if you could be more specific about what you didn’t like about it.”<\/p>\n
“Well… um… It’s not a very… original concept, is it? I mean, kids raised by wild animals and all. Even Disney’s done it.”<\/p>\n
“Really? I thought it was a rather good update of a classic theme. Learning more about our humanity by comparing us to wild creatures. The whole ‘Nature vs. Nurture’ argument, combined with a touch of the 18th century Primitivists’ Noble Savage.”<\/p>\n
“But onions are plants.”<\/p>\n
“Yes, and his real parents were industrialists! Tearing up farmland to build factories… That’s the source of the struggle in the last two thirds of the book.”<\/p>\n
“I.. Uh… I don’t think I got that far.”<\/p>\n
“Start with Chapter 6, ‘Raising a Stink at the Ol’ Factory’. There’s a copy of the manuscript on the desk in your study.”<\/p>\n
“Wait. What?”<\/p>\n
“It’s right next to the photo of your wife and kids.”<\/p>\n
“WHAT?”<\/p>\n
“Give it a read. I’ll call you back when you’re done.”<\/p>\n
>click<\n<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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